satc

well i'm half way through the week and really excited about the first Avalon Summer Cook-Out this weekend! i had a really boring and long day at work and coming home to the girls and a night of gossip, good food & fun was just what i needed. sometimes when we are all together i wonder if women in the 1800's sat around like we do and just talked?

i got some really great advice from my mom today about character & self-respect. it's always when you think you have all it all together and "figured out" that someone literally rains on your parade. i am thankful though - who can say that they have a dad that would kill for his family's happiness? i do and i'm thankful - i don't need a fake family that looks good on paper. what i have is real and honest love and support for one another.

while watching sex and the city last week i heard carrie say this,

"maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back, maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be"

now i know carrie wasn't aristotle or da vinci but what makes more sense then that line? i have a hard time letting things go and i think thats something in my life that could use a little work. this line inspired me to reevaluate what i hold in high regard in my life. in the year 2010 who thought that we would be in economic hell and 80% of the population would be suffering in some form or another? it is time to change something - finding out what is for the next blog.

testing the water

well i have made it to my last summer as a college student and it begins the same way, work and more work. this summer feels different though - not only have i moved into a new house but i have moved in with my best friends. i said good-bye to someone recently which is something i don't like to do. i'm so proud of her though and so very lucky to call her my sister & friend.

i think my summer will bring about changes in my character, outlook and well-being as a 21 year old trying to understand whats next. i can usually see into the future with a general outline of what i want from life but now that i've learned i can't always get what i want, things are hazy now and it is refreshing & exciting all at the same time.

i used to think that life would be easy and the hardest decision i would have to make would be where to eat for lunch - boy was i wrong. i have become my mother and i'm not afraid to admit it because unlike some people i have a mom that a girl would die for. i love to care for others and think that my happiness should be second. so this summer i'm devoting myself to me and finding out what it means to be lauren.

this journey will be bumpy and i'm very prepared. so with helmet on and suntan lotion ready i am prepared to make the most of my summer vacation.